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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29670681">When your best isn't enough, what's left? Family</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Apple_soda/pseuds/Apple_soda'>Apple_soda</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Adopted Children, Adopted Sibling Relationship, Adoption, Alternate Universe - Foster Family, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Bonding, Fluff and Angst, Foster Care, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Past Drug Use, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, but first chapter is a fight uh, characters and relationships with actualize with time, no beta we die like my grades, really confused by tags author, tried fluff</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 23:48:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,290</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29670681</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Apple_soda/pseuds/Apple_soda</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Having a family is hard, Phil knew that already. And was pretty sure that every one of his children knew that being part of one was even harder, so he tries his best, everybody does. Because most of them choose this family over blood, and some had no choice.</p>
<p>But sometimes your best is imperfect and really fucked up. So they all have to get costumed to be imperfect together. </p>
<p>Or, my take on foster care, a little more deep, weirdly composed hurt/comfort slice of life (almost a vent fic uh)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ranboo &amp; Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; Wilbur Soot &amp; Technoblade, Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit, TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot &amp; Technoblade &amp; TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>36</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Green lights. It doesn't mean you can come in.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Being beat up wasn't anyone's preferred activity, at least, not his. That’s why he was curled up on the ground, hugging his knees with his long arms, trying to cover his ears from insults and name-calling, the people doing it weren't stupid, they guided him on propose away from the main areas, and he had followed in fear of that negating got him something worse, it started soft, it always did, even if this was this kids first time, for a moment that gave him a little hope maybe it was just a challenge, they would leave him alone after a short slap and fake apology, but he was shortly on the ground, hopes and sunglasses shattered, someone had punched him on the stomach as a way to lower him, something about being “too tall to properly punch” and in no time they were all watching that kid punch him, chanting like if it was a fair fight; he was grateful when his auto proclaimed friend stepped in, including himself on the fight to distract them from the <em>weak</em> and <em>wretched</em>  “bi-color child”. He had never been one to fight, but he was sure that when the blonde was overpowered for a second he could have launched himself.</p>
<p>Then didn’t happen, not for long at least, because when Tommy was suddenly on the ground and was laughed at, when the blonde was about to defend himself with words and a playful smile he was punched in the face causing more laughter, so Tommy in response, as he always did, screamed and launched himself for a second round, this time less graceful or proper, both resumed their fight, more strong, more fierce, more rage put in very movement, in the middle of punching and gross name-calling, they all could see blood and one of them had given up, Tommy didn’t, he kept punching until the kid under him had started crying, no longer fighting to prove he was stronger but to <em>get away</em>.</p>
<p>Everyone around them seemed to remember where the blue-eyed blonde came from, he was <strong>Technoblade's pupil.</strong> The chanting slowly died to the realization, making space to the crying that became louder with every punch on a leg, an arm or the kids face, Tommy was huffing by the time he stopped and various kids ran away or stiffed when he started to get up, trailing the first aggressor from his green shirt collar to raise him on the air, it wasn’t much, maybe some millimeters in the air, but it didn’t make the action less terrifying. He was about to tell him something when another kid used Tommy’s open pose to punch him on the side, making him let go of the first one, who instantly ran away; he seemed to look at himself, then at the bi-color child.</p>
<p>His words were cut two times this day when the green shirt teen came again, still crying, but this time surrounded by adults. None of them had an opportunity to say anything.</p>
<p>That's how he ended up in front of the principal’s office, gloves and glasses long forgotten on the alley behind the school, his left hand moved to smooth the edge of his black jumper, the right one continued to open and close, playing with his own fingers; for being freakishly tall and easily a threat Ranboo, that was his name or at least what he remembers it is, presented himself as one of the most calm persons on this whole faculty, maybe that made him a victim to situations like this one, that left him disoriented, dirty and with fear that one of his only friends was expelled because of his actions, because at the end, this was the “bi-color child” fault. It always was.</p>
<p>Something sour surged on his throat to the nickname, meanwhile the burnt on his skin wasn't something of his own choice, the look he wore almost every day maybe served to justify for it, maybe that's why when another teen came up with the name to make fun of him, it eventually led to everyone using the bittersweet nickname. Somehow he found the way to blame himself for it, saying that at the end of the day it was his look that made the others find sense on it, his hair, a weird combo of black and white that in good days will divide neatly, half burnt skin covered by the white and black mask, even his gloves had the fault, yet that didn’t mean he was good with it. He preferred nicknames put by his friends, even “memory boy”, sounded better, warm, just a playful and a little embarrassing reminder of his long term memory loss.</p>
<p>His eyes, the right one a green color that reminded him of wet grass, and the left one an amber that almost reflected red, traveled across the room trying to ignore the teen that cried in silence two seats next to him. It was funny, almost hilarious, that kid was not new to beating him up, (he had checked, only saw at least three new faces) the adults always turned a blind eye to his bruises and dirty clothes, but the moment tears and pleading had been done, they decided to take action, only because there were at least seven people involved a that point; Ranboo tried not to be angry at him, but he couldn’t stop the frown to form on his face in view of the injustice, they even took the wrong person, if they wanted someone to blame they could take the green shirt teen, even Ranboo himself could have taken his part of the blame.</p>
<p>Ranboo always choose people over authority because of this, because Tommy was getting into trouble for being a hero, he trusted people, because people was good, and it was power what broke families and separate houses, what made teachers insufferable and cops bad, what made fathers angry and made them burn houses. Unconsciously Ranboo guided his left hand to the right one when he felt too much pressure on his palm, no one wanted the shed of more blood. Tommy was no hero, because power made heroes bad, corrupted, so he wasn’t a hero, Tommy was a friend that came to help when he saw him on trouble, Tommy was a good friend that defended him, even if it was punching him.</p>
<p>Ranboo smiled at the thought, his right hand tight grip loosened and his left one stopped smoothing his jumper, he found himself just smiling to the idea of having a friend that will do that for him, take the blame and beating someone up weren’t easy.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When Tommy got out of the office and the green shirt kid looked terrified at him, he only smiled fiercely in response and stomped his feet with more strength than necessary taking out a weak whimper for the contrary, he was off, his limps tensed right after the other looked away, and his eyes lost their small spark of life, he seemed terrified to Ranboo’s eyes, to others, he was apathetic; it was not until the blonde took his seat next to Ranboo that he saw how his fingers moved, small movements that fought to be either hysterical or strained.</p>
<p>“Is everything-” Ranboo should not have talked, the only response he got was the sudden ´crunch´ of the report paper being bent with too much strength between the other hands.</p>
<p>However, Ranboo obtained his response not even five minutes after, when Philza Craft came through the hall, his energy matched the one of a quiet upcoming storm, and if Ranboo could feel it, he understood why Tommy sank on his chair, long gone his confidence, only his pride formed a thin barrier stopping him from shivering like a leaf and crying, unconsciously clinging himself more to Ranboo when Phil only looked at them from a second, eyes full of fury murmuring a small “stay”.</p>
<p>If it was directed to Tommy or him, Ranboo didn’t know, but neither of them moved from their place on the long hall in front of the boring principal’s office.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Red lights, and a fake hero complex.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>CW/ Mention of past drug use</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tommy was a lot, brave, strong, bold, courageous, even a bit fearless, a big man himself; but there was a thing he would always disagree with, even if being careless sometimes marked him like that. </p>
<p>Tommy wasn't <em>dumb.</em> </p>
<p>That’s what he wanted to tell the principal, which insisted on thinking that he was stupid or something, a dumb bitch that caused trouble for attention; yes, he was young and in some manner powerless, he could tell that from his plastic chair in front of the dark oak desk that his principal insisted looking down upon him, Tommy doesn’t cherish being powerless, nor liked it, not at all.</p>
<p>He wanted to scream and tell the so-called authority he was a bitch, but he couldn't, not when his chest was pressed down on invisible ties, subjecting his mouth and arms from bolting, storming out of the boring dead lime color small room, crashing the door or the fake trophies aligned on the walls, he shouldn't either, but Tommy, at the short age of 14 had done so many things he should not do, one more would be unimportant.</p>
<p>But he didn’t, and he was unsure if that was what had provoked him more, or the pitying look on the teachers eyes when he paused scrolling through his old computer screen, because he shouldn't give him pity, <em>no one should</em>, never give him pity. </p>
<p>Tommy knew perfectly what he was doing, that's what the cocky smile on his face told, that's the story he tells everyone, that Tommy knew perfectly what was he doing at all times, if others don’t, that's their problem. At least it wasn't drugs, his smile extended at the thought, he had tried drugs once on one of his previous foster homes, he had done reckless things afterwards but wasn't able to feel none of them, which was part of why he stopped using them, because when you’re on drugs it is impossible to create a getaway from your troubles, he learned that the bad way. But he took pride in that he stopped by himself, no adults or authority figures, just <em>him</em>. </p>
<p>And for so long it had been just him, no adults that mattered or people around him that <em>cared</em> enough to warn him, it had always been him and no one else, the fact that Phil was there now didn't change anything, not in the way the principal assured him it did at least, because it was still just him, surviving on his own, only accepting the food and shelter Phil gave, ready to bolt, to jump away at any sign of violence, Tommy also took pride in that, because keeping your walls up is hard, mostly when there is people like Wilbur that insisted on him going downstairs, talking to Phil when he was out of his long work trips, Wilbur was the only reason that Tommy had decided to stay, that and maybe Tubbo.</p>
<p>And that's what he wanted to explain when the principal started his lecture about his behavior, apparently punching someone is not “appropriate behavior for a kid his age” and “it will stain his record for a greater school opportunity”, but he wasn’t going to stop, not for an adult that thought knew more about Tommy that himself; so he resisted the urgent wish to hug himself, to become small on his tied up chair trying to hide from the eyes of <strong>pity</strong> and <strong>shame</strong> that that adult gave him, trying to cut the imaginary chains and letting himself cry right there, no, not in front of him, or anyone for the matter, so whether fake or real tears, he pushed them behind, opting for extending his smile in protest of his bruised left eye, sitting straight up even if his torso ached in return.</p>
<p>Because Tommy, that at this moment looked like, and was about to be, wasn't a <em>problem child</em>, nor a child at all, and if he even punched someone he would negate it even with every card on his deck against him, because it hadn't been <strong>his fault</strong>, he didn't <strong>start it</strong>, he <strong>finished</strong> something that should be over already, because he wasn't the one to punch the bi-color child, he had <em>helped</em> his friend, and he <strong>defended</strong> him on <em>the only way he knew how</em>, because the kid crying outside was a <em>pussy</em> who at the sight of loosing, in the middle of the punching had ran away calling a professor. In fact, the principal should be grateful, because this wasn’t Tommy’s fault, and he made sure no one bothered the bi-color child again better that any school propaganda ever made.</p>
<p>Tommy was sure that he was not a hero, or a<strong> hero</strong> <strong>tryhard</strong> as Techno had teased him with so many times before, heroes aren't hated, heroes aren't thrown away by authorities, heroes have families of friends, or real families, no one looks at them with pity or disappointment, no one disrespected heroes and called them childish or stupid, so Tommy was no hero, he was something else, not a villain (he had seen many villains, Tommy doesn't want to be like them) but he was ok with being something else, as long as he got to punch bad persons that bothered him or his friends, he was good with that.</p>
<p>He was not a problem child, so he took his report with a too proud smile for the situation and was about to leave. </p>
<p>And that's when the adult used a more serious tone, and announced that he should wait outside, <strong>because he was going to call Phil.</strong> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Fun fact? I stared at this chapter and the first one trying to decide which one would go first. They were written for homework as Ranboo POV (the posterior to this one) first and the Tommy POV, but translated first Tommy and then Ranboo, so yeah, you can read 2 y 1 or 1 y 2, and they would make sense.</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Im sorry if some things don't make sense im not a native english speaker and punctuation just confuses me. If you spot any mistakes let me know!</p>
<p>Small reminder that this story is meant to be a calm spot for me, so it will probably not make sense and have weird actualization/chronology. So yeah, be free to ask questions tho, im happy when that happens.</p>
<p>Give me comments i need them.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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